I wrote this post a few weeks ago late in the evening after having a bad day. I didn’t publish it immediately because I wasn’t in the right place to post it but writing it all down, getting off my chest is just what I needed to do!
I guess I am posting it now for any Mom’s out there who are reading this to know that trying to be the perfect parent is impossible! It is normal to have a bad day. It is normal to have a rant about our children, it doesn’t mean we love them any less!
And this is my real life…….
Being a full-time Mom to 3 Little kids, has its ups and downs. I am an honest person sometimes too honest for my own good. This post is just me putting how I am feeling about my kids in a raw, real personal view so if you don’t like those kind of blog post I suggest not reading on…… but if you’re a real Mom like me then you can probably relate to some of this.
September 2017- this is my year!! When I say that I mean for the first time in 8 years, I have 3 hours every morning to my self. 3 hours to fill with things I like to do! 3 hours of not being Mum!! I have utilized every minute of it lol. Its only been over a week but its been a great week, well its been great in those 3 hours when 12 o clock strikes it’s a different story. (I’ll go onto that in a moment) I have been filing my 3 hours with me time, for example I was at the gym twice last week, I got my eyelashes done off my friend, I went shopping ON MY OWN!!! It really has been great!
Then at midday my day changes dramatically. Just a little back story – Jack is in 3rd class and he is in school till 2.30 every day and goes to homework club till 3.30. Emily started school this year she is in junior infants and finishes school at 12 for the first 2 weeks, 1.30pm from then on. Annabelle is entitled to 2 free pre school/Montessori years, 3 hours a day 5 days a week. Yes I am sending her the full 5 she loves it and she is well able!
First I must collect Annabelle before I collect Emily, I am usually in a bit of a rush to get Annabelle into the car which I feel she knows this and has a strop when I put her in her car seat because she wants to get in herself. Out she climbs to go straight back in, she is testing my patience here! Then on to collect Emily so far so good until we get home!!
I don’t know what it is about the 2 girls but within 5 minutes of being at home they are fighting! It’s like they have been so good in school that they have to leave out all their pent-up energy when they get home. They are bouncing off the walls shouting and screaming, running around like lunatics! I can never keep up with them.
There is 2 years between the girls. Annabelle just loves to be around Emily and copies EVERYTHING she says or does it is cute, at times. Other times it’s very annoying especially when Annabelle is eating her dinner and loves it and Emily says “I don’t like it!” Annabelle will push her plate away and say the exact same thing !! That is so frustrating !! I am like ” you were just eating it, you just said mmmm yummy!! How do you not like it now!!!!”
Next big issue we are having is the not telling the truth! For example, someone poured water all over the table. I walk in and in my calmest voice I ask who did this? They both blame each other. I ask again tell me the truth who did this?? Again they both blame each other now my voce is slightly more raised and I am demanding some one tell me the truth who did this!! Eventually Emily will say we both did it. I do try to explain that if they tell the truth then they wont get into big trouble but it never seems to work. The only good thing is if Emily isn’t honest with me, I know! I know every time she is lying to me. It must be her age or something if anyone has words of wisdom on this please share!!!
Some days I just feel I spend most of my day giving out. To the point I’m tired of giving out. Twice this week Emily was sent to bed at 6.30pm for not doing what she was asked. Which is one of my pet hates, I have a few but that one just gets at me the most. If I ask you to do something like pick up your toys, put your plate over by the sink, wash your hand before dinner or go to bed, just do it straight away! Ok, bed time always takes a few trips up and down the stairs I think everyone is the same there? Please say you’re the same lol. I do feel at the end of the day I am so tired and worn out from them that I just want to hide in the bathroom, pretend I am using it but really I am on my phone looking through my Facebook or Instagram!
Jack and I usually argue over his homework so that’s why this year he is doing after school homework club. It seems to be working so far.
I guess why I am writing this is to share this to you and if you relate to one or two things, maybe even all of it. You are not alone, I am not alone! I know as a Mom I try to do the best I can for my children. Yes I might give out a little or mutter bad words under my breath at them, untill they ask what did you say and I reply with a smile, “nothing love”.
I know I love my children and it might have been a bad day today but do you know what tomorrow is a new day. Start each day as a new one! Let go of yesterday!
You are doing the best you can! We all are!!
From a Mom that is not perfect nor will I ever be but I will learn and grow with my children.